Don't You Hate It When God Tells You To Do Something That Makes It All Worse?!

In the beginning was the Logos...the Reason. Sometimes, preachers or denominational councils will say that God told them to do a thing, or that the Spirit revealed a thing, and that is meant to silence any questions or debate (e.g., the top LDS leader recently said that God told him to exclude children of gay couples from the rite of baptism). But if the thing that God supposedly told one person or one small group causes outcry, pain, distrust, mass anxiety, and if Reason isn't part of the process (but rather a divine dictate that can't be proven is the final authority ...how convenient for the one/s God directed), then a healthy hermeneutic of suspicion is in order. We don't have to agree with him, of course, but the Apostle Paul thought that "God is not the author of confusion..." Something to think about when autocratic decisions are trying to be forced in the name of God and the result is utter chaos.

A Prayer for Metropolitan Community Churches in a Time of Great Need

My prayer for the movement (Metropolitan Community Churches) to which I have given half my life so far. It represents my heart only. The movement has barely more than half the churches it had a decade ago, and morale within the movement seems to me to be at an all time low. This is a pivotal moment for the movement; all heart-felt prayers are needed at this time:

Goddess of Justice, Lord of Love, Healing Presence, Guiding Light:

In this blessed moment we pause to give thanks for MCC Founder Troy Perry's vision, his courage, his willingness to affirm the sacred value of all people. Through him, you opened doors that had been closed for far too long; through the movement he launched, many of us found a home, a family, a purpose, and a reason to celebrate who you called and created us to be.

MCC told LBGT people that they mattered. MCC was the embodiment of healing love during the worst of the AIDS crisis. MCC let people in the pews realize that "God" is not a boy's name. MCC changed the world.

But somewhere along the way, we collectively stopped believing that we were uniquely called to do a new thing. Somewhere along the way, we decided we wanted to "fit in." We were tired of fighting, especially after surviving and even winning so many battles. We longed for validation from the "mainstream." And increasingly, we got it. Our righteous indignation which fueled holy Queer activism softened, and as our passion waned, our effectiveness began to wane as well.

In a time when religion is being questioned and old attitudes are being challenged, we had a chance to be something different, fresh, beautifully radical. But instead, we turned our fears, frustrations, and uncertainties into internal battles. We fought for internal recognition. We fought for privilege within our diminishing ranks. We fought to protect the status quo. We fought for the thrill of fighting rather than to achieve any noble purpose, and when the thrill was gone, we continued to fight out of sheer habit. And now, the once compelling vision is buried and we see no angel to roll away the stone to let the vision rise to new life again.

The question so many ask today is, "What shall we do?" And that question seems to have many answers. Some will stay in a declining movement. Some will become radically ecumenical and join multiple organizations, not giving 100% of their devotion and support to any. Some will simply slip away. Some will end their relationship with MCC and start new relationships. We see these options being embraced already.

We have worshiped the deity of the past, the golden calf, Apis the bull-god of yesterday, and now our dreams and hopes are scattered; our tomorrows will be beautiful, but also dispersed. What we have known and devoted so much of our lives to is fading before us, and it is impossible to go back, and we seem to lack the courage and vision to be new again as a movement, so we must be new as individuals and as separate parish communities.

Where we failed, forgive us.
Where we allowed fear to win, forgive us.
Where we allowed personalities to trump possibilities, forgive us.
And whatever the future holds, help us to make the most of it and to thrive in the new day.

Bless Troy, your anointed prophet who changed, and in many cases, saved our lives. Bless those who will continue moving forward. We may never again be the MCC slaying the Giants of homophobia, parting the waters of terror in the age of AIDS, turning the water of discrimination into the wine of marriage equality, and showing the world that worship can be prophetic, energetic, empowering, and ridiculously fun, but let us also never forget that we were that MCC, and whatever we do or become next, that history is part of us and will be part of all future successes.

The days ahead cannot be known to us today, but what we can know is that individually, we still have work to do, and in our communities of faith, we still hold a sacred vision, and we know that as we remain faithful to our highest and best understandings, to our deepest and strongest hopes, to our truest longings to be your love in action and your healing hands touching people in this world, you will continue to work through us and lives will still be changed and blessed, and the world will be better because of our faithfulness.

In your good time, heal our grief, but let us not wait so patiently to do good in the world. We'll embrace healing as and when it comes, but we can't wait for healing to continue to build communities of hope, celebration, and Justice-love. So, let us be about our divinely appointed work, help us do it well, and fill our tomorrows with blessings that are better than any we've known so far. That will be a great miracle, but we believe in miracles. And so it is.

HIV: Memories & Hope

     It was the 1980s. I was in college. I was home for the holidays and met some of my old high school friends in a local bar. We hadn’t been “out” in high school (some of us were still sorting out our feelings and attractions) but we had each discovered and happily accepted our sexual orientation since graduation. It was great to be back home and together, living out loud as the people we were meant to be. Our level of connecting and sharing was richer, deeper, and more profound than it had ever been. Living in the power of truth has that effect, doesn’t it?

     During one of those heart to heart and soul to soul conversations that young adults like to have late at night in dark bars, I said to one of my friends, “I’m so scared of this AIDS stuff that’s out there. I don’t know what I would do if I got it.” Without missing a beat, my friend responded, “I have it.”

     I was devastated. It was more than concern for my friend, however. There was a level of terror that swept through my body as if I had been given the diagnosis. You see, it was the first time someone I knew had been diagnosed with the HIV virus. His self-disclosure made it all very real to me. If he could get it, anyone could. I could. It was no longer just a news story; it was as of that very moment part of my life.

    My friend was luckier than many in those early days. He went from nutritional therapies to monotherapies to combination therapies. He survived as treatments advanced. And when the day came for me to tell him that I had sero-converted, he was supportive, loving, and encouraging. He showed me that a diagnosis need not define us or steal our joy.

     One day many years later, my healthy, athletic old friend, who had proven that the human spirit is potentially indomitable, drowned while on vacation. After going toe to toe with HIV with remarkable success, an undercurrent at a Delaware beach is what ended his life. It seemed surreal. My grief was powerful and long-lasting.

     It’s a new year, and somehow this new beginning brought to mind these ancient memories, but the memories are accompanied by a sense of gratitude for the strides we’ve made in HIV care since those uncertain days. The memories also stir within me a hope that people will no longer contract HIV (it is preventable). I hope those who are HIV positive will become aware of their status and get life-saving treatment. I hope people will lovingly remember those we lost too soon. And I hope that HIV awareness and activism continue until all who are positive are liberated from shame and stigma, all who are HIV negative remain so, and at long last, a cure is found.

     AIDS isn’t over yet, but I still believe that it can be defeated if we will remain vigilant. May this new year be a happy and healthy one for all of us.

Rev. Dr. Durrell Watkins is the senior minister of the Sunshine Cathedral in Ft. Lauderdale

written for the Florida Agenda

People of Faith Don't Always Have to Take Themselves Too Seriously

Religion at its best should be joyous. One should take delight in laughing at the ridiculous (though, sacred stories are usually only ridiculous when taken literally). Virgins and 90 year old women getting pregnant, dead guys refusing to stay dead, small picnic baskets that feed thousands, using a feeding trough for your baby's bassinet, talking donkeys and snakes, magic fruit that gets you evicted if you eat it, every species on earth squeezing onto a cruise ship, a guy having an extended stay inside a fish...there are some deep and profound philosophical truths in all that if we look for them, but on the surface, that's some funny shit!

Holiday Wishes for the LBGT Community

The Holiday Season is meant to be joyful.

During Hanukkah, we recall the story of a limited amount of oil keeping Temple lights burning for eight days in a row. The Hanukkah miracle reminds us that during our times of uncertainty, there is an inextinguishable light of hope within us.

During Christmas we imagine the innocence of baby born in humble circumstances but celebrated by angels; that baby reminds us that we are each a child of God.

Kwanzaa honors African heritage and celebrates the gifts, skills, and contributions of descendants of the West African Diaspora. Kwanzaa challenges us to affirm and appreciate our diverse global family.

And the New Year is a time for releasing the past and looking with hope and expectation toward the possibilities that lie ahead.

No wonder the holidays are filled with gift giving, feasting, prayers for peace, and songs of wonder and joy. It is a sacred season.

However, for LBGT people, it can also be a lonely season. We’ve made many advances in recent years and we’ve overcome many obstacles, and yet there are those who do not celebrate our legal and cultural victories with us. The Right Wing of both politics and religion threaten at every turn to do all that they can to reverse recent advances for LBGT rights and equality. Christian fundamentalists have doubled down on their anti-gay rhetoric. Municipalities have proposed ordinances that would deny many people the protections they need if LBGT folk are included in the mix. And some families, influenced by the worst of politics and religion, have abandoned their LBGT family members, or told them they are welcome home for the holidays only as long as they don’t mention their sexual orientation.

For LBGT people, the holidays can bring up old wounds, or subject them to new insults, new experiences of rejection, or fill them with remorse for not having supportive, loving families that embrace them for they are.

So, to LBGT people who have formed strong, healthy families of choice: Congratulations and Happy Holidays! You are demonstrating the healing power of love.

To LBGT people who remain in the closet, or attempt to return to the closet at least in part in order to spend time with relatives during the holidays, my heart goes out to you and I beg you to affirm your own sacred value. You may never persuade your relatives that you are who are meant to be, but please don’t let them persuade you that you are not. You are part of the beautiful rainbow diversity of humanity.

And to all allies of LBGT people, loving parents and siblings, cousins and friends, aunts and uncles, grandparents and godparents who love your Queer family member not in spite of who they are, but who love them exactly for who they are, let me tell you that you are heroes and your love and compassion will enrich lives and touch hearts in profound and life-giving ways.

The Holidays are meant to fill us with hope, joy, and goodwill. As LBGT people often need those very blessings at this time of year, my wish for our entire community is that the best of the Season will fill our hearts and bring healing to our world, or at very least to our experience of it.

Rev. Dr. Durrell Watkins is the Senior Minister of Sunshine Cathedral in Fort Lauderdale.

This column was originally written for the Florida Agenda

The Frightening Revival of White Supremacist Rhetoric

I grew up among white supremacists, homophobes, misogynists, anti-Semites, and xenophobes (I had an uncle by marriage who was truly a despicable bigot in almost every regard). I was surrounded by violent rhetoric, fear, anger, hatred of the other, and all strangely wrapped in the language of Christianity...but it wasn't a Christianity that promoted peace, goodwill, tolerance, love of neighbor, welcome of the stranger, or a celebration of human potential. Jesus wasn't presented as a model of integrity, as a symbol of healing, or as an example of living in communion with infinite Goodness, but rather was a "savior" who was the key to the cosmic country club for some and the great avenger who was going to kick ass and take names at the end of time (and those who were going to face peril far outnumbered those who were going to find heavenly rewards)...and the worst part of this scenario was the agitated and perverse glee that many expressed while yelling their threats of damnation while being oh so certain that they were exempt from it. It was not religion at its best, in fact, it left wounds that took decades to heal from; it inspired my life's work of offering an alternative narrative, an option of being "Saved From Salvation" (note my book of the same name).

I mention this, because the same demographic of people who used Jesus as a gate-keeper and the bible as a weapon and who embraced racism, heterosexism, and misogyny at least as passionately as they embraced their version of religion (though, their prejudices were often affirmed as central tenets of their faith) are the ones (that I see) who are now rallying with horrifying boldness around the anti-immigrant, anti-Brown, anti-Muslim rhetoric being touted in recent days.
Franklin Graham, Donald Trump, and Anthony Scalia have embraced without apology or timidity the language of white supremacy, and are gaining political ground by doing so.
It is devastating to realize that over 60 years of civil rights work and advances are being undermined so openly, so energetically, and with the support of so many Americans. Of course, I dare not give up hope that "the better angels of our nature" will prevail, but in many ways they seem to be bringing up the rear right now.

Those of us who value diversity, the rule of law, opportunity, and equality must speak out, and we absolutely must vote in every single election.

A Message & a Prayer In Response to Recent Anti-Muslim Statements

Dear Friends,

Some of us know very personally how hurtful and dangerous it is to be a target of prejudice. We know how frustrating it is when an individual or a group within our larger community does something wrong and all of us are blamed even if we disagree with the action. We know that hate does not heal hate and fear does not heal fear.

So we, in particular, ought to be uneasy when we hear public leaders, religious and political, calling for the expulsion of Muslims from the US, and/or for blocking Muslims from coming into the US. Decency, compassion, and a memory of history calls us to speak out when entire communities are targeted, marginalized, or vilified. We, who are religious, must also value the FREEDOM of religion. Freedom of religion is not the freedom to impose our religious values, but to worship as we choose (if we choose to worship at all).

In my parents' lifetime, Jewish people were denied entry into some countries where they might have been safe while Jews en masse were being incarcerated, tortured and killed in Europe. In my parents' lifetime, American born people of Japaneses descent lost their homes and livelihoods in this country as they were rounded up and incarcerated for no reason other than sharing a heritage with a political enemy. In my parents' lifetime, there was a great deal of anti-Catholic rhetoric when the first Roman Catholic won the presidency. And in my lifetime, there were several states where every act of love or romance shared between persons of the same gender was a criminal act.

We who know the pain of being targeted simply for being who we are cannot be silent when other groups are treated so unjustly. Even Jesus, whom Christians wish to follow, had to endure the insulting question, "Can anything good come from Nazareth?" Isn't it time to dispense with the rhetoric of hate and exclusion?

And so, not only do I feel the obligation to name the problem of racist and xenophobic slurs coming from some leaders (and I am thankful for those leaders who openly reject such rhetoric), but I also feel the need to ask all who would be faithful to resist such rhetoric as well. There are frightening events in our world, and we do want to respond to violence and terrorism, but blaming those who have not participated in acts of terror will not keep us safe...it will only cause pain for the innocent.

In response to divisive, fear mongering rhetoric, I offer the following prayer. It is in times of challenge that we must cling to our highest ideals and best principles, and prayer can help us do just that. Let us pray:

God of Abraham, Sarah and Hagar,
God of Isaac, Rebecca, and Ishmael,
God of the East and of the West,
God of Jews, Christians, and Muslims,
God of all life, all love, all hope, and all compassion,
We see acts of violence done in your name by people of various religions,
and we hear public voices condemning religions rather than seeking to hold
individuals that blaspheme their religion with violence accountable for their reprehensible actions.

But we who are of Irish or Italian or Mexican descent,
We who are of African or Caribbean descent,
We who are Jewish or Catholic or Mormon or Jehovah's Witnesses,
We who remember our mothers and grandmothers having to fight for the right to vote, to work, to have control over their own bodies,
We who are same-gender loving people,
We who are transgender or gender non-conforming,
We who had our Native cultures decimated or whose families were interred for their Japanese heritage,
We know that the language of bigotry is the language of fear, of hate, of division, and that no good thing comes from it.

And so, today, during this holy Season of Peace and Goodwill, we pray for our Muslim sisters and brothers, that groups that dishonor their faith by using it as an excuse to do violence will cease their troubling, and that those who refuse to distinguish between bad actors and an entire global community will be healed of their prejudices.

May we remember that in every religious tradition there are those who dishonor and misrepresent the tradition, including our own; but nevertheless, all people are the children of God, and religion, all religion, at its best seeks community, justice, compassion, generosity, and peace.

May we who have been demonized or dehumanized in the past never resort to treating others in the ways that hurt us so deeply, even as we work and wait and wish for peace and justice in all the world.
Amen.

In the spirit of our common humanity,

Rev Dr Durrell Watkins
Senior Minister
Sunshine Cathedral