Saturday, August 22, 2009

Fat As I Ain't

OK...i'm not bragging (its still premature for that), but i am really excited. you see, i discovered tonight that i have lost an inch and a half in my hideously fat neck! from a 19 collar to a 17 1/2 collar...i haven't been able to wear a 1...7.5 in YEARS. The shirt is probably out of style and I couldn't care less! i'm wearing it proudly, buttoned to the top with a tie. i may one day be fit again afterall.

neck 17.5 (down form 19). waist 34 (down from 36). weight 201 (down from 218). its been the slowest, hardest weight loss ever (about 8 months...but i've been the most consistent/commited for the last 4)...but for the first time in years, i haven't given up after 6 or 8 disappointing weeks. so...2 more inches in waist to go. one more inch in neck to... Read More go. 13 more pounds to go. but actually beleive i might make it this time. thank you tod (who works out with me every week so that i don't throw in the towl and replace it with twinkies).

This is quite a different story than I posted on Oct. 17, 2006 where I was simply resigning myself to corpulence and trying to find the wherewithal to celebrate it. If Fat and Fabulous is the best I can do, I'll take it. But, honestly, Fit and Fabulous is better. I want it. And I'm really getting close (hopefully the obesity gods won't strike me with a terminal craving for Krispy Kreme and thus undermine all my hard won progress...but for now, it's looking good).

A blast from the past:
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Fat As I Am

Wasn't it Sophie Tucker who sang, "I don't want to get thin; you can laugh and you can grin but I'm doing very well the way I am"? Oh for such self confidence!

And didn't Mae West in mid-life and full figured just know that she was sex walking! Oh for such self assurance!

And wasn't it Bette Midler who made fun of herself by singing, "Fat as I am, who wants to see a diva fat as I am..."? How wonderful to laugh at one's foibles rather than taking them too seriously.

Well, here I am, weeks away from 40 and for the first time in life I've passed the 200# mark on the hateful, satanic scales of scorn. Every photographic image of myself, every mirror reflection, every bathroom scale, every pair of pants that fit me only two months ago that now serve only to cut me in half as I try to zip them up all remind me that I'm starting on the back 9 and I may need a cart to finish!

Oh, I swear that I will get to the gym or take a pilates class or sit on a cushion and meditate the lbs away. But mostly, I drink another soda (never diet) and prepare for the next Star Trek rerun on TV. After all, Captain Kirk is quite corpulent these days too. At least I have my hair, though the same mirror that shows my Santa belly and double chin also demonstrates that my luxurious hair is as a grey as a mule's. Can I please catch a break?! Though, at this point I couldn't even catch a frisbee (not that I would bother to try).

Maybe this is what middle age is like. I keep hearing that 60 is the new 40, so why does 40 look like the old 60?! It isn't fair.

Maybe I'll get to the gym. Maybe I'll will away the poundage and release the svelte inner homo that longs to re-emerge. Or, maybe I'll channel the spirit of Sophie and decide that I'm doing very well the way I am. I think that may be the answer. My new resolution is to have the attitude of Ruth Brown, who sings, "Now look at this nice bottom, ain't it easy on the eyes, guaranteed to support any weight or size!" Or in the words of a song from that fun musical, WHEN PIGS FLY, "Put on a few its not so bad, your man will learn to love it; I have all I ever had - in fact I have a lot more of it."

Yes, there are reasons to get back in the gym and work on being healthier. But I can be happy with who I am right now. At any size, at any age, I'm a damn good person. Now I feel fantastic! I think I'll celebrate with a pizza. Hey! Who are you to judge?! I'm doing very well the way I am!!!

1 comment:

Amy said...

Glad to hear the collar is no longer a neck girdle!