Compline - End of Day Prayer

January 9, 2025

COMPLINE with +Bishop Durrell

[Compline is the end of day prayer as one prepares for sleep.

Tonight's Compline includes reflection and meditation as well as a closing prayer.]

California is on fire. Lives are being turned upside down. It will take months or years for some people to fully recover.

By the way, it’s fire. It’s not a divine tantrum or a curse or the fulfillment of some ancient prognostication. It’s fire. It happens. We don’t need superstition or conspiracy drama. What is needed is our concern and our compassion and our generosity.

While fires rage in one area, bitter cold attacks others.

And while the elements misbehave (and of course climate change is a factor and should be addressed), a country mourns the loss of a great humanitarian.

President Jimmy Carter’s work with Habitat for Humanity, and the Carter Center’s work around the world, has touched innumerable lives. In addition to election oversight and diplomatic efforts, the Carter Center also employs about 200 people in Atlanta and thousands more throughout the world. The sort of leader who never stops trying to make the world a better place for everyone is too rare, and now there is one less. Of course we grieve.

BREATHE. Let’s spend one full minute in silence just noticing our breath. Let’s take a full minute respite from all the crazy and all the scary and all the unknown. Let’s have one perfect minute of relaxed breathing and calmness. We deserve it and we can have it. Right now.

Following the breath can be a prayer. A prayer for peace by embracing it and letting it then float into the atmosphere. Another word for breath is “spirit.” When we connect with Breath, we are touching something sacred and powerful and beautiful. Breathe.

We can also ask the Universe to help us, or the angels to guide us, or the ancestors to be with us, or the saints to pray for us, or for the God of our understanding to hold us throughout all the ups and downs of life. Breathe. Pray. Repeat as needed.

My close of day prayer:

Let showers of blessing heal California, and a warm breath of heaven minister to those facing dangerously cold temperatures.

Let peace seem more real than problems. And may we have the courage and the grace to hope, no matter how many times hope didn’t seem to change the outcomes. Still, hope banishes despair, at least for a while, and sometimes, what we hope for does come to pass. Oh, let us dare to hope, or at very least, let us hope to find hope.

May the legacy of Jimmy Carter continue to bless the world, and may we bless his memory even as his memory inspires us. And may humanitarians and peacemakers and justice workers and lovers of humankind rise among us, and may we be willing to count ourselves among them in some measure.

It is in peace and with faith that I pray. Amen.

Bless you and Good night.

+Bishop Durrell

We will get through a second dystopian Trump era - but we must stick together and love one another through it.

Nov. 5 - bundle of Nerves.
Nov. 6 - Shock. Depression. Anger. Incredulousness. Anxiety. Grief.
Nov. 7 - I was starting to regain perspective and letting myself feel determined again.


These were my thoughts on social media November 7:

Okay, I've had a couple of days to pray, marinate, ponder, wallow in denial, then in self-pity, then in fuming rage...you know, cope. Now I'm in a better place (but I reserve the right to come apart at the seems on any given day from now until Nov 2028).

So here's my sane moment: 45/47/34 aka Felonious McPredator von Perfidy will unleash unfettered Dickery & Fuckery & Shittery & Ass-Hattery & Buffoonery & Stankery (so many eries). We will be aghast. Then we will be furious that we were even the slightest surprised. Then we will be demoralized that we live in a country where he is both not incarcerated and is somehow, by anyone at all, admired. But, this is the reprise of this number. We know how it goes. We survived the original production of Orange Turd: the Musical. We'll somehow manage to get through the Revival. 

We are again "the resistance." We will have to use every tool at our disposal: law, hope, collective compassion, righteous indignation, love of neighbor, love of self, love of liberty, forensic skill, creativity, resilience, imagination, snark, humor, camp, spirituality, music, film, theatre, comedy, history, pride, storytelling, self-care...to protect ourselves and one another. We'll grow stronger in the process. We'll love more fiercely. After every fall we will get back up, middle finger at the ready. We'll be okay because we have one another. 

Yes, there will be ugliness, but it will not diminish or demolish our beauty. Our Queer and Trans and Subversive and 2 Spirit and Nonbinary and Ally and Ase and Intersex and Questioning and Pan and Poly and Leather and Drag and Bisexual and Interfaith and Agnostic and Humanist and Pagan and Atheist and Progressive Christian and New Thought and Jewish and Muslim and Buddhist and Hindu and Sikh and Baha'i and Tattooed and Pierced and Camp and Body Positive and Sex Positive and Weed smoking and Feminist and Womanist and Democratic Socialist and Poetic and Artistic and Science Trusting and Peace-seeking Woke and Ever Woker selves will prove indomitable, invincible, and indefatigable. 

It won't be easy, but we will be mighty and we'll survive and ultimately prevail. Don't give up. We faced Sodomy Laws, we faced opposition to marriage equality, we faced AIDS, we faced religious bullying, we faced unenlightened families and cruel neighbors...if nothing else, we know how to survive. 

Rest when you need to. Fret when you must. But then, get back in the fight. We are going to prove to be absolutely legendary in the next few years. My favorite table grace is: "God bless the food and the revolution." I'll be praying that daily for quite a while. Alright girls (I say that in the most gender non-specific way): It's time to slay (in the gay way that isn't lethal, but still, you for real don't want to be the recipient of Queer slayage).
--dw
#slay #ResistFascism #resistproject2025 #wegotthis #StrongerTogether #resistance #keephopealive #lovewins #lgbtqiaplus #lgbtqpride #staywokefolks

Lots of Feels as EDS’ St. John’s Chapel is Deconsecrated Today

The Philadelphia Divinity School and the Episcopal Theological School merged in the 1970s to become the Episcopal Divinity School. EDS had diverse faculty (Episcopal, Presbyterian, Jewish, Asian, African American, Caucasian, men, women, gays, lesbians, lay, ordained) and a diverse student body (Episcopal, Catholic, Lutheran, UCC, Unitarian Universalist, MCC, Seventh Day Adventist, Baptist, Anglicans from Kenya, Uganda, Jamaica, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, India, etc), and it was part of a world class consortium (The Boston Theological Institute) which included Boston College, Boston University, and Harvard.

EDS was a special place dedicated to anti-oppression work, to an inclusive gospel, to sharing the all-inclusive and unconditional love of God.

And, more than a school, it was a community. One never really was graduated from EDS. One was degreed, but never felt the need to “leave.” One to three times a year, every year since I earned my DMin there, I would go “home” to EDS.

EDS lives on in the ministry of the church I pastor and in parishes, Cathedrals, Chaplaincies, service organizations, the diaconate, classrooms, and hearts all over the world.

Last year, EDS was closed down (unnecessarily, in my view, and in ways that many of us resisted). EDS’ name and money still exist as EDS@Union (basically the Anglican house of studies at Union Theological Seminary in NYC, my other beloved theological alma mater). If the merger had been done more transparently and honestly (by EDS trustees), and if EDS could have retained a degree program (MATS or DMin maybe), I think it would have been something I could have celebrated (two great schools joining forces), and/or if they had kept one or two EDS faculty (they sacked them all) that would have been at least kind (and bridge building). Instead, the merger feels more like loss and has caused grief for many.

These thoughts are with me as St John’s Chapel on the campus of what was EDS in Cambridge, MA is deconsecrated today. God bless the EDS diaspora and the EDS energy that still flows through so many ministries.

I Remember

I REMEMBER

I, like everyone else, remember September 11th, 2001 when New York City and Washington, DC were attacked by hijacked aircraft. I remember the fear, the loss, the pain. I remember other things as well.

I remember the world extending concern, good wishes, and compassion in that moment of despair.
I remember communities coming together to raise money, clean up rubble, help wounded people, and comfort one another in a time of grief. I remember that a decade later, the master mind behind the 9/11 attacks, Osama bin Laden, was killed. I don't rejoice at any killing. I might have preferred he be captured, tried, and incarcerated. But in any case, there was a sense of closure.

A lot was lost on 9/11, but so much more was spared, and good things were stirred within us. Heroism, compassion, resilience...the best of our humanity overpowered a moment of tragedy.

I have other remembrances, today. I remember that 9/11 wasn't the first, last, or largest tragedy to impact the human family.

I remember that the US government went 7 years without officially responding to the AIDS crisis. I remember that lives were lost because we failed to summon the better angels of our nature in time to contain a pandemic. I also remember when effective medications were finally released and people started living well with HIV, having real hope for long lives.

I remember growing up in a very homophobic environment, too scared to even admit to myself that I was gay, living in shame, fear, and confusion. I remember all those feelings rushing back to mind when Matthew Shephard was brutally killed for being gay. I also remember when Vermont started offering legal civil unions to same-gender loving couples and when Massachusetts first allowed same-gender loving people to marry, and that since those initial breakthroughs marriage equality has gained a lot of momentum. 

 I remember when Don't Ask, Don't Tell was overturn and LBGT people could serve openly and proudly in the US military. I remember that we have made a lot of progress.

I remember that our nation's history includes slavery, Jim Crow, and bloody battles for civil rights. I also remember that on November 4th, 2008, the 44th president of the United States was elected and he is a person of African descent.

I remember that on December 7th, 1941, the Japanese Empire attacked Pearl Harbor. I remember that following that, Japanese Americans were unfairly imprisoned in their own nation just because of their ethnic heritage, and I remember that on August 6th, 1945 the first time any nation used a nuclear weapon in war was when the United Stated dropped an atomic bomb on Hiroshima. Three days later Nagasaki also experienced nuclear devastation. Today, Japan is a democracy, a major economy, and an ally of the nation that they once attacked, a nation that retaliated with world changing force.

I remember that a prayer that we use weekly at Sunshine Cathedral is actually the gift of a witness of the atomic bombings of Japan, Masahisa Goi, who prayed (as we do each week), "May peace prevail on earth."

And today, I remember two journalists who were brutally killed in Syria and I wish their families comfort in the days and months to come.

There are many sad events in history to remember, and we should remember. But let us also remember the healing that followed, the opportunities that sadness could not take away, and the hope that remained for better days.

Today, I remember 9/11/01, but I also remember that pain was not invented that day, nor did pain win that day. Hope is always the indestructible force, and so while I remember events from the painful past, I also remember that we always have the power to hope and work for a better tomorrow. Let's do remember that we have the power of hope.
 

Blessings,

 

Rev Dr Durrell Watkins

Senior Minister 

Sunshine Cathedral 

Loving And Letting Go

There is family, and there are relatives. Sometimes they are the same people, but not always and not necessarily. When people cut you out of their lives, sometimes without caring enough to even tell you, that's them struggling with their insecurities, fears, self-loathing, or regrets. Don't take it on. If they love their politics, their money, their religion, or their bigotries more than you, that is their deficit, not yours.

And, if people are happy to keep you in their lives but mostly as an emotional punching bag, then don't take on guilt if you need to walk away. You can do it without bitterness and with an openness to future reconciliation, but love doesn't mean being anyone's doormat.

Love yourself and be thankful for those who love you (as you are, not as they insist you should be), but don't let yourself be too miserable if the ones who do love you aren't the ones you once thought were "supposed to."

In the end, the silly games, dramas, and petty conflicts won't matter to any of us, except for the time they caused us to waste.

Blessed are those who mourn...

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Jesus (Sermon on the Mount)

In Good Times & Bad, Keep Praying... by Rev Dr Durrell Watkins, Senior Minister Many people have been in my thoughts and prayers lately. There are those who are on our prayer list (where they stay for four weeks at a time) as well as those in our congregation whose circumstances are known to me. I've been very mindful of some who are looking for work. I've been thinking of some who have been recovering from (or preparing to have) medical procedures. There have been injuries. There has been grief over the death of cherished loved ones (friends, relatives, even pets). Over and over my thoughts are filled with the words, "God bless him" or "May she soon discover joy again" or "I affirm blessings for them, trusting that divine Love holds them and will not let them go." Sometimes the prayers seem to contribute to miracles. Sometimes, the prayers seem to offer comfort. And sometimes the prayers seem to do little other than to help the one praying feel as if loving concern prayerfully expressed might somehow make a bit of difference that cannot yet be felt or seen. Still, in prayer I remember that "there's not a spot where God is not." When we remember our unity with God, we are much more likely to experience hope, joy, and fulfillment; and even when outcomes disappoint, there remains the divine gift of inner peace and self-worth which were not given to us by life's circumstances nor can they be taken away by life's circumstances. As the Apostle Paul said, "If we live we live for the Lord; if we die we die with the Lord. So, whether we live or die we are the Lord's!" In more contemporary verbiage we might say, "I am never separate from divine Life. No matter what happens in life, I am Eternity expressing in time; I am an individuation of perfect, universal Wholeness." Today I have been praying for one of our deacons and his life-partner. I heard this morning that John was suddenly very ill. Updates throughout the day were consistently discouraging. Finally, this evening, I received a call saying that John made his transition from this experience of life to the next. His partner, Deacon Ed, is one of our faithful diaconal care-givers who provide pastoral care and comfort to congregants when they are in need. Today, my heart is heavy for Deacon Ed and I continue to pray for his comfort, for his strength, for his pain to soften over time into beautiful memories, for his grief to become a healing process that leads him gently back to abundant joy. Perhaps you have been blessed by Ed reading the gospel or praying for our various intentions in worship. Perhaps you have been encouraged by him or have known about his ministry to seniors. So, I am asking you to hold Deacon Ed in your heart in the days ahead, and bless him with your love.

Dear God, the light that we knew as  John shines throughout eternity, forever blessed by the Love that you are. And so we give thanks even as we ask you to hold  Deacon Ed in your tender care and keeping and offer him the comfort he needs in the days to come. Amen.